How to revive the love in your partner

Published: 03/08/2012 - Updated: 10/17/2018

Do you feel that he doesn’t love you anymore? Do you suspect he is getting away from you? Does not he call you as before? If you really want to keep your relationship and don’t lose someone you love, there is a lot to do before your partner decides to leave you. While it is understandable that relationships go through many things and in some cases, it is best the separation, it is always desirable when we really care about someone to put our best cards in the game, because that love between the two can happen again.

Do not despair

Do not despair if you notice that your love is away, as if he catches you like that, you have less opportunity to relive the attraction. Also, if you get impatient or act by sentimental impulses, you run the serious risk of losing him.

To avoid despair, the first thing to consider is that your partner is not really "yours", i.e., he is a person with dreams, ideas and adventures to discover in this life, and he likes to do things by himself just like you.

Become a chameleon

Many times we have determined a relationship pattern; we like to feel that the other is ours, which often makes us feel jealousy, insecurity. And we forget that our partner should be our friend. This friendly affection with the couple is very necessary because sometimes we need to approach as the best of listeners, and learn to listen questions, fears, insecurities of your partner, without feeling attacked or offended by his commentaries.

So, if you feel he is getting away, become his friend, put aside the idea that he is "yours" and strikes up a friendly communication. Understand again his dreams, his life, but without asking for something in return. If you really do not want to lose his interest, become a chameleon that adapts to the circumstances, and become his friend for a while.

Give him freedom

It is important that you express to him what you really feel, and ask him to be honest with you. If he says that he no longer feels the same about you as before, he may need some time or take a new direction. And why doesn’t he take that direction again with you? If you try, you must show great understanding and, above all, avoid drama. And take into account a golden key in these cases: if you concentrate on his happiness, then you give up attachment and let him free, if you really want to be happy, you must give him freedom to search what he wants. And perhaps he is looking for a “new you". Maybe you think that this is not a good idea, because keeping him away from you is painful. But, thinking in his happiness, instead of thinking only on what you want, can be a really seductive attitude and your partner can consider the relationship again, even if he leaves you, he may come back and reconsider. But you have to let him move or do what he feels at the moment, and to say that you are happy with that.

Do not show that your life depends only on him

It is important to avoid saying that you will lose your happiness or your life if he leaves. Your partner should feel that you have built a personal world and you know how to support yourself and how to fix your life. This does not mean you have to act like a robot or pretend it does not hurt. No. Be honest, express your feelings, but always with the attitude that you do not depend on him to be happy, even if it hurts a lot to walk away.

Be someone to conquer or discover

Humans like the conquest, the new and unknown. Easy things, predictable and routine, as well as too difficult or complicated, gradually lose value. So put some mystery in your life, do not tell him everything, do not tell him where you walk, let your partner discover or rediscover, to get curious about your world, tell a little, but not all.

Love smartly

Many times when we love someone, we fall into extreme attitudes or unintelligent. Giving love does not always mean to give everything. Many times, not giving, gives more than anything else. If he doesn’t look for you to chat or dating, avoid the temptation to speak to him. Let him do the move, even if takes some time. Once he calls you, be enthusiastic and friendly, avoid any claim; tell him something happy happened to you in these days. Say one sweet little phrase like "I miss you", but avoid falling into a long conversation about that. The message should be "I'm fine without you, but we can have a good time together".

If he doesn’t call or look for you

The best is to find new things to do. When someone is no longer attracted to you, the worst thing you can do is claim him, ask or beg, as this will only take him away again, and you will feel more pain and emptiness. You have to do all your effort to focus your attention on other things, perhaps that person really was not for, so learn to trust your destination, even if it hurts or costs at first, you will flow and focus on your happiness when you find someone great for you.

About the author
  • K. Laura Garcés G

    Writer, therapist and lecturer. She is a lover of natural medicine and the power of mind and emotions in body and life. In addition, he has studied nutrition and develops appropriate diets to support this healing process.She has written more than 1500 articles in magazines in Spain and Mexico, winner of two literature contests. Linkedin.

3 Replies to “How to revive the love in your partner”
  • Lisa says:

    Nice article, it?s always hard when someone doesn?t love you anymore, we have to learn to grow up with every situation that happens in our lives, even the bad ones. Love is something beautiful that we should enjoy making happy another person to make us happy as well.

  • Alison says:

    I’ve always thought that if he doesn’t seem to love you anyone or is off when you are with him, he is getting with someone else, the most important thing is communication and being honest with the person, tell him what you feel and if he doesn’t care, then throw away that bastard! KIDDING!

  • Stacy says:

    Umm…I’m not quite sure I agree with this article, at all. While I do invest in the idea of giving someone freedom – as all of us need freedom, and we need to possess the personal strength so as to not need the other person to need us – these ideas are unsettling in so many ways. Love is not a game of manipulation or playing “chameleon”. Love is an unconditional gift that you GIVE someone. You cannot MAKE someone love you…and you shouldn’t “need” to. Any “need” you feel should only be a sign that perhaps you don’t embrace yourself enough. Let’s learn to love ourselves before we start making unrealistic and unhealthy demands on others.