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Love flourishes with the limits

Love flourishes with the limits
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Published: 07/06/2008 - Updated: 10/19/2018

Author: K. Laura Garcés G3 Comments

If you often feel that people abuse you, you are not respected trusted, if you feel guilt when you say no is that you need to set boundaries. It is likely that we have heard this a few times around. Someone says: "Put your limits” and then we try to understand the concept, but at the mere hours  it is hard for us to implement it. This may be because somehow the word seems to limit us, deep down, loving little, implying that we need to check the "distance" in our personal relationships. And as we understand love as a deep and closer thing, then this could be confusing.

But, the limits are the more loving activity of our nature, the limits are the conduit through which we can see a very genuine attitude to share with what surrounds us.

Contents

  • Confusing mess
  • Respect what you are
  • Yourself, your character
  • What to do?

Confusing mess

Note around you: everything has a form, contour, a limit, the table, a face, your own hand, everything has a shape. And every way, say, has its limits. If the plant had no limits and their colors overflow, if your hand is diluted with the window and the container with the clothing of your neighbor, then it would be a real mess, and the relationship you have now with what surrounds could not take place because everything is messed up.

You have a very spontaneous nature which gives it a unique and genuine attitude to your way of being. When you break this line, and start affecting what you are, giving preference to what you're not, then we could say that with what you've lost your form to become a mess with yourself and the relationships to be somewhat confusing that can cause pain and many other non-pleasant emotions.

Respect what you are

Talking of limits is, in essence, of respect for what you are on your way to be honest. When you respect yourself, then you are in a very clear, original and honest way to those around you. The problem here is that you do not know when, when you do not know how you really like, when you have not managed to establish a genuine and honest relationship with yourself, then it will be very difficult in to share with others, you'll very often tend to become "a mess" in your relationships.

Yourself, your character

What is being a mess? You lose your way t understand the other forms as they are, and this is where the concept you have of yourself, for yourself is weak, confusing, unclear. When yourself is weak or confused, you cannot give you value, because one cannot value what does not know it, so having confusion about who we are is the same as lower our value. This is why we "stir up" your feelings with others, and expect to obtain a clear value from your relationships, but the problem here is that others will act with rejection, contempt, estrangement, because they want you to share your clarity, your strength.

Being a mess is like, in other words, lack of character, and admitting this is no reason to feel guilty or weak. Recognition is the first step to begin to regain a clear picture of oneself.

What to do?

What to do when you're not considered or respected is to go within yourself and identify where you have lost your way, i.e. where a person has not been honest, sincere, and just to himself. When you lose the compass, you lose your way, and are confused when it is your responsibility, so you do not correspond to the other.

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This requires action on your relationships in a very loving act that sings I'll give myself, to myself. Which means you must start with yourself and ask what is required out there: if you ask for respect, respect who you are, whether to require consideration, it starts with you, if you do not understand why you do so cruel that, start to get a clarity about life that really want to get stronger and start to walk away and say no to those who do not want in your life.

Fear of rejection and guilt are two major obstacles to overcome, and sometimes endure situations because we fear losing. In reality there is nothing you can lose. And if something is lost if it is the doubt. Furthermore, I believe it is better to lose one hundred friends and earn the value of oneself, than to lose yourself and win one hundred friends.

Remember one thing: no one really knows how to love, because we are all learning how to do it. If you expect someone to love, you will spend your life waiting, which means you spend your life without love, simply because no one will love you if you do not start. So turn yourself and be friendly with you, now you can start realizing it has been unfair and where you put in bad situations that cause you pain. If you insist on this rather than waiting for someone you love, then I assure you that you will love some night, and resting next to you is that person, to never leave your side.

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(3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)

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About the author

By K. Laura Garcés G

Writer, therapist and lecturer. She is a lover of natural medicine and the power of mind and emotions in body and life. In addition, he has studied nutrition and develops appropriate diets to support this healing process.She has written more than 1500 articles in magazines in Spain and Mexico, winner of two literature contests. Linkedin.

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Comments
  1. Jason

    30 de September de 2013 at 03:53

    Well the topics of love are a little bit hard to explain and many people just fall confused in this situation, but the lack of confidence and character is what leads you to forget about yourself to help the others and many times you are not getting what you demand, then the problems start but this is really your own fault

    Reply
  2. Mary

    1 de June de 2014 at 03:59

    You just described me in the first lines, that’s why I kept reading till the end,. and you are right…

    I should change my attitude toward the world and start a change from my inside, that’s the only solution

    Reply
  3. Stacy

    27 de September de 2014 at 03:56

    I really liked this article, adn I like the core message that it is stating, however, I would re-word the title a bit. I feel that unconditional love knows no boundaries, no limits. This “removing limits” that this article refers to, I believe would be more aptly described as “redefining self-love and respect”. If you have self-love and self-respect, limits are not needed.

    Reply
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