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When you forget yourself

When you forget yourself
  • Probiotics and health benefits
  • Hair treatment with laser

Published: 05/26/2013 - Updated: 07/12/2016

Author: K. Laura Garcés G4 Comments

If you are somebody that wants to please everyone, who gives more and more of your time and efforts to others and always leaves yourself until last, continuing to do all kinds of activities (chores, work, taking care of children, etc.) without considering time off for just for yourself, it is time to take a few minutes to let you know that when you forget yourself, this manifests and causes everything that is going on in your body and mind.

While we have been taught that giving to others is an act worthy of love and service, we often forget what it really means to give. If you are not well aware of this word then you could be finishing the day exhausted, mad or angry, unwilling or without energy but to sleep and not wanting to know about or do anything else.

To begin to find true honesty, we need to start by first giving to ourselves. The first person to make you happy in this world must be yourself. If you insist on making others happy or just address your daily pending chores during the day and forget about yourself, then you will need many fleeting joys, like tobacco, alcohol, talking or eating a lot and using sex as a release, among others because this helps you to lighten the lack of love, attention or performance which your life is craving.

Contents

  • How do you know if you're forgetting yourself?
  • Why do we forget ourselves?
  • Give to yourself
  • What does giving to yourself actually mean?
  • How to start giving to yourself

How do you know if you're forgetting yourself?

  • When you expect a lot from others (either respect, admiration, attention, etc..). If you do not receive it, you are disappointed easily.
  • When you get angry or despair often (because you expect a lot of others).
  • After partying, being with a partner or out having fun, you feel as if "something's missing".
  • You get sick often.
  • You feel unsafe or very shy (because you live according to what people think of you).
  • You take what others think of you very personally (because you live depending on what others think about you).
  • You do not feel very enthusiastic to get up in the morning.
  • You complain constantly about others (do not accept them because either you don’t accept yourself, because you do not take time to get to know them and learn to love them).
  • You feel that other people have a better life than yours.
  • You often feel that you are missing something very good life.
  • You do not feel lucky or fortunate.
  • You have a dependency, like smoking, eating, wanting to help others (without first helping yourself, etc.).
  • You have uncontrollable anxiety.

Why do we forget ourselves?

We usually forget to give time to ourselves because we have been taught in a way that puts other people's needs first. Our society puts great importance on acceptance and "fitting in" and so we have to meet many requirements in order to be truly happy.

Today it is fashionable to change. We must adapt or change our true selves to be like others or to be accepted/loved and we must do many things to achieve this: To say yes, when we mean no (or vice versa), to take jobs we do not like, say things we do not truly believe in, etc. All of these things lead us away from our true selves and we forget what we really love and want, as well as our stunting our development as individuals.

Give to yourself

When you give to yourself first, before anyone else, it generates an energy flow in you which makes you feel successful and happy: This will radiate and give you a special charisma. Starting by giving yourself is something that actually generates very special progress. It may be difficult at first, as you may be waitng for others to help you, but you must make the change yourself. Also, if you begin to give to yourself first, you will have much more energy, strength, creativity and a sense of humour to cope with everything you have to do and experience during your daily life. You may also find that you get sick less, feel more generous towards others and will perhaps be more honest and accepting.

What does giving to yourself actually mean?

Giving to yourself means that you start to give to yourself all of the things that you want, need or expect from others: time, patience, understanding. If you have all this, you won’t need it from others, and will not be waiting silently saying: "Why do they not listen to me?" "Why not me?" "Why do not you give me …?" and then you get mad when you see that the other does not follow through with what you want.

How to start giving to yourself

The first is to start in the mornings. Before you start rushing around because you are late, take a moment to say thanks for the day and say good morning! It is important to have loving thoughts in your head, speak in a dignified way and program yourself with a positive mentality for things to flow beautifully every day.

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  • Do an exercise that you like and enjoy, such as dancing or walking, and give yourself time to enjoy it before leaving home.
  • Do not eat like you are a bag of sand, i.e., do not eat just to fill yourself up or because it's good for you. Eat with pleasure, with time, and enjoy your food, ensuring that it will make your body feel good.
  • If you get angry during the day, take a minute to let off steam and reflect why you are dissatisfied with yourself or others.
  • Check yourself often during the day: Take note of the way you treat and talk to other, avoid criticising, saying negative things or speaking unkindly.
  • Before going to sleep, take a few minutes to think of things that happened that day which made you feel good or bad, and try to listen carefully so you can improve tomorrow.

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(4 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)

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About the author

By K. Laura Garcés G

Writer, therapist and lecturer. She is a lover of natural medicine and the power of mind and emotions in body and life. In addition, he has studied nutrition and develops appropriate diets to support this healing process.She has written more than 1500 articles in magazines in Spain and Mexico, winner of two literature contests. Linkedin.

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Comments
  1. Ronald

    29 de May de 2013 at 23:12

    I get angry very often and I tend to keep a lot inside my mind until I explode in front of anyone who pisses me off, well I want to change this because it has caused me a lot of trouble at work and with my family, I have read this random article and I?m really interested in using this to change my attitude so thanks

    Reply
  2. Remi

    4 de May de 2014 at 03:50

    never forget about yourself, that is losing you in the middle of nowhere, maybe you can get back but maybe you won’t and that is sad for sure, even for the people near you

    Reply
  3. Stacy

    13 de August de 2014 at 06:31

    Oh man, I have this problem big time. I’ve really learning to be a lot more self-aware and self-appreciative over time, but when I was a teenager and working through those tumultuous years, I wouldn’t even realize how off centered I would get until BAM! All of a sudden I felt like I had lost the very center of my being. So I would take some time to look around, and finally realize that I had been forgetting myself in everything, in school, activities, even relationships. It has been a long struggle trying to overcome this habit, but I’m proud to say I am a lot more centered than I ever thought possible.

    Reply
  4. Emily

    16 de May de 2016 at 14:44

    This is an absolutely fantastic article which resonated really strongly with me and the point I am at on my own personal journey to living a healthy, more conscious existence. I constantly blame others for my lack of time/effort/affection and I am only now learning to dedicate more of these things to myself rather than relying on somebody else to do it for me. Being grateful is also a great way to stop feeling so low and victimising yourself. Time to change and give myself what I’ve always wanted!

    Reply
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